It all started back in 2022 during my internship. I was a productivity machine, completing every task at hand way faster than anyone expected. This left me with an abundance of free time, which, let me tell you, is both a blessing and a curse. At first, I tried to kill time by looking busy—clicking around aimlessly, rearranging files, the usual tricks—but eventually, boredom hit me like a truck.
That’s when I noticed something that ignited a spark of jealousy: a friend of mine had the coolest username on Discord. It was short, lowercase, and effortlessly memorable. The kind of name that made you think, “Wow, this person has their life together.”
And then it hit me: I want that. Not their exact username, obviously, but my own short, simple, lowercase masterpiece. A name so unique it could work across every social media platform, email, and domain. Something so original that nobody on the planet would’ve thought of it before me.
That’s when The Big Change began.
Day 1: I sat down, full of ambition, and started brainstorming. My criteria were clear: lowercase, short, simple, and absolutely untaken. How hard could it be, right? Turns out, harder than it sounds. Every decent idea was already taken. I Googled and cross-checked usernames until my brain felt like mush.
Day 2: My coworkers started noticing something was up. “You’ve been staring at your screen for a while,” one of them said. Little did they know, I wasn’t working on tasks—I was deep in the username trenches. I tried everything: “berrythis,” “lessberry,” “truefruit,” “falsenut.” Nothing felt right. Nothing was me.
Day 3: By this point, I was questioning everything. Why was this so hard? Why did I care so much? And then, out of nowhere, it hit me: trueberryless.
At first, I wasn’t sure. Did it make sense? Not really. Was it ridiculous? Absolutely. But it was lowercase. It was unique. And most importantly, no one else had taken it. It had that weird, quirky charm that just clicked.
So there it was: my magnum opus of usernames. “trueberryless.” The name that would define me across the internet.
Now, you might be thinking, Three days for that? Really?
And to that, I say: Yes. Greatness takes time. Besides, who needs true berries when you can be berryless?